Do you think that you’re terrible at self-care? If other people advise you to find time for self-care, are you curious how to make that work out?
Self-care does not automatically come to all of us, particularly when our to-do lists are filled with demands from other people. You may not feel like you have the time or resources to make it work, so it sinks to the bottom of your goal list.
A few years ago, I had to be honest with myself about the reasons why I didn’t practice self-care on a daily basis. It turns out that my lack of time and resources was basically my own fault, and I was just making excuses for myself. I found that there were three main patterns I ignored in my life that negatively affected my relationship with self-care.
In this post, I’m sharing what these three patterns are and how you can make them a priority.Keep reading so that you can find out what needs to improve so that you can make self-care better for yourself!
The essential habits of self-care
I assume there are three main behaviors or habits that have a major effect on your relationship with self-care. Whether you find you’re terrible at self-care or you’re out of your normal routines, it may be because you’re neglecting one of those things.
The three key habits are:
- Boundaries
- Self-discipline
- Consistency
Let’s be honest. It’s not fun focusing on these habits. Not once did anyone suggest that boundaries, self-discipline, or consistency are enjoyable. They’re not, and that’s why it’s so hard to practice it. So once you’re focused on developing them, life becomes more enjoyable, so you can generate more time and energy for things that matter to you.
How do these habits affect self-care?
Setting boundaries with yourself and others is necessary for protecting your time and energy. When you’re clear with your boundaries and make every effort to stick to them, you give yourself permission to focus on your own needs.
Discipline means that you don’t push aside the things you need on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level. It’s about sticking to your boundaries and not letting things slide. When you practice self-discipline, it’s a sign that you respect yourself.
When you’re consistent with your actions and habits, you can ingrain self-care practices into your routine. Rather than letting self-care become a random occurrence, consistency allows you to make it part of your lifestyle.
How to cultivate these habits
Set boundaries
To get a better idea of your life limits, decide what type of actions you can and will not allow from other people. If late-night email requests from your professor cause you to lose sleep, you are responsible for establishing (and communicating) a barrier to keep this from happening. No one else is going to do it for you.
Think of the non-negotiables, too. These are all the things you care about when you make arrangements.Decide how much time you want to spend on these aspects of your life. If demands or invitations from others cannot match these items together, say no.
Practice self- discipline
Self-discipline is about the removal of temptations. If you’re flipping through Instagram late at night and you say you’re going to bed at a decent hour (sleep is self-care, my friends!), you’re not exercising self-discipline. Instead, place your phone in the room, turn it off, or remove Instagram.
Do whatever you can to reduce or remove temptations so you can prove to yourself that you are in control. If you want to get better at self-discipline, you have to remove the temptations and distractions that cause you to let your goals and intentions slide.
Be consistent
Consistency occurs as you take small, deliberate actions to make a particular behavior a routine. Instead of having to change all of your habits at once, start by setting a target of self-care for yourself and focus on sticking to it. For example, if your aim of self-care is to work out for 30 minutes every day, start by developing self-discipline in this field.
Which self-care habit do you struggle with?
I’d love to know how boundaries, self-discipline, and consistency come into play in your life. Remember that making small tweaks to improve your habits and actions is the key to better self-care!